The Role of a Sibling Doula: Helping Big Siblings Adjust

Bringing a new baby into the family is such a beautiful, life-changing moment, but it’s not just the parents whose lives shift—it's also a big change for older siblings. As a sibling doula, I’m here to support that transition for those big brothers and sisters, helping them feel seen, secure, and connected in their new role as the family grows.

When a new baby arrives, older children often feel a mix of excitement, curiosity, and even confusion or worry. They’re watching their world change right in front of them, and that can stir up a lot of emotions. This is where sibling support comes in, making a world of difference by offering emotional reassurance, gentle guidance, and a focus on creating special memories during those first days and weeks.

Understanding What a Sibling Doula Does

A sibling doula helps big brothers and sisters navigate their feelings around the arrival of a new sibling. My goal is to be a steady presence, one that helps them feel involved, reassured, and comfortable in the changes happening around them. I work closely with parents to understand what might help their older children adjust and develop a plan that meets everyone’s needs.

Whether it's offering gentle answers to their questions about birth, reading books, drawing, or even just keeping them company while parents rest, sibling doulas create a positive environment that lets siblings stay engaged in their family’s special moment.

Supporting Sibling Bonding

One of the most powerful aspects of sibling doula support is fostering a connection between the older sibling and the new baby. I guide them through ways they can interact with their new sibling safely and lovingly. Maybe it’s helping them hold the baby with support, showing them how to soothe the baby with soft songs, or simply celebrating their role as the 'big helper.' This helps siblings feel proud of their role in the family and start forming that bond right from the beginning.

For older siblings, knowing they have a unique place in this transition can turn any fears they may have into a sense of excitement and love. Watching them grow into their new role is an incredible experience and one of the greatest joys in my work.

Giving Parents Peace of Mind

Being a sibling doula is about creating ease for the entire family. It means parents can stay present in their birth experience, knowing that their older children are being lovingly cared for by someone who understands birth, family dynamics, and the emotions that come with this life-changing event. I’m here to answer the little questions, support the big feelings, and provide reassurance when they need it most.

The goal is to help everyone, especially the big siblings, feel confident, supported, and celebrated as their family grows. That sense of stability and care during such a pivotal moment is priceless.

When a Sibling Doula Might Be Right for Your Family

Each family is unique, and not every older sibling will need extra support, but for many, having a sibling doula can make the transition to becoming a big brother or sister smoother and more joyful. If your child is anxious about what’s coming, if you’re birthing in a location that doesn’t allow siblings present, or even if you just want to create extra peace around your birth, having a sibling doula can be a beautiful addition.

At the end of the day, my goal is to make sure that every member of the family feels supported, cared for, and loved as they welcome a new baby. Watching siblings light up with pride, knowing they’re important and loved in this big change, is a truly magical part of what I do.

If you’re considering sibling support, let’s talk about how to make this experience as meaningful as possible for your entire family.